On Friday, the state of Michigan, which arguably has the most untrustworthy Secretary of State in America, added 26,662 unreported votes to its unofficial vote total from four counties after canvassers reportedly discovered the stunning discrepancies.

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Voters around the nation were immeasurably grieved to hear that the candidate who overspent her campaign account by millions of dollars will now never get the opportunity to fix the American economy.